“Trust is the most essential thing towards a successful relationship. Yet, it’s the most easily deceivable.”
It’s a fact I picked up while reading another blog.
Trust is a tough concept.
It means giving someone the power to hold on to your secrets or to tell them something no one knows about you and expect them to stay mum about it.
How far can you trust someone? On what criteria can you decide to trust someone? When is it right to trust anyone? How far should you trust a person?
I’m sure many of you get greeted with one of these questions in your mind almost every day.
Talking on personal terms, I have trusted 90% of the wrong people my entire life and still find it hard to trust anyone anymore. I don’t even feel that I’m capable of trusting my own feelings along with many others! The results of trusting have been ruthless and unhealthy.
A normal person cannot define the difference between a friend and an enemy because they’re not sure which person is playing what role and whom to trust with their deepest and darkest secrets.
How does one choose to respond to a “Do you trust me?” question? It’s again hard to answer that, especially when someone close to you asks. Everyone expects one of their own to trust them. Think about it. I’d surely feel dejected if my friends couldn’t trust me.
What are the consequences of bad trust? What is the worst that could happen to you? I can faintly recall those days of twisting and turning in bed, clutching my stomach, trying to stop myself from crying too much or playing some depressing track from my playlist on repeat. Is that what anyone wants to do? Trust is a like a piece of paper, once it’s crumpled it’s too hard to remove the creases. That belief you had that entire time, nothing can stop it from crashing. Not until you yourself choose to. You might feel like you’re falling into the deepest, never ending pit of death in the movie 300 and you’ll never bounce back. Here comes the concept of time.
They say time can change people. It can change emotions. It can change feelings. It can change the amount of how much you trust someone. Time can change anything. It can change anyone; physically or mentally. One just needs a little bit of patience but how much is that little bit? I could go on asking these questions and never get a definite answer.
Trust builds any relationship. You trust your parents. You trust your friends. You trust your other half. That very same trust will one day get broken. Since nothing is perfect, nor is the concept of trust. Every day, everywhere, everyone is wounded by broken trust. Those scars shall always remain. It can be as easily broken as a porcelain bowl falling off the table. The lies, the untold truth, the new inventions and even those white lies; trust is broken anywhere.
Trust means you know there is someone to hold you while you fall or someone who has your back. What I can gather from my own experiences is to take some time before you get to start trusting anyone. Observe them, learn more about them, and take mental notes on how the person is before you jump right into trusting them. I won’t talk about how short life is and how we should all live on the edge of it and enjoy. Take your own sweet time in getting to know someone. It’s a lot safer than getting your trust broken and ending up as a depressed soul.
As for trusting yourself, I’ve learned to go with my instincts. They always tell you to choose your heart and not your mind. Well, use both.
All you can do is wait. Wait forever, wait an eternity. Trusting someone is part and parcel of life. I’ve dealt with deceiving friends, cheating boyfriends, countless other incidents and I’d never learn anything from it but I’d like to quote the following to conclude,
“It takes a lot of courage and trust to look past what you’ve been through and trust someone new not to put you through it again”